I Have A Plan

When I was younger I had a plan. For everything.

In second grade I wanted to be a pilot. I had it all figured out. I wanted to fly. And the best way to do that was by flying a plane.

Because I never learned to do things the simple way. It was either the high way or no way.

Than in fourth grade, I wanted a horse stables. I had no idea how that actually works. But I loved horses so I wanted a room full of them. And make a future out of it.

In 6th grade, I wanted become a Chartered Accountant. I loved Mathematics and the highest degree I could think of was becoming a CA.

In 10th grade, I was set on becoming a doctor. I was going to become a surgeon. and not just any. A Neurologist. Or a dentist if that did not work out. I know, too much of McDreamy.

Somewhere in between I also wanted to win the biggest debate competition and be called, "Debater of the World". I know now, that term does not really exist.

Than when I fell in love with writing, I did not just want to write short stories or articles in a magazine. My ultimate goal was to write a book. And that will happen, someday.

But that's just me. When I do something. I like to do it big. Or not do it at all.

Everyone has a different definition of doing it. That's just mine. And its ridiculous sometimes.

Now, I am studying to become a Chartered Accountant.

My two best friends are in Medical school.

I want to pass and get a private flying license one day.

I want to own a horse. Just one, in this case.

I got the Speaker of the Year award which unbelievably came into existence.

My articles get published in different places from time to time. And I have a blog. The book is on its way.

Somewhere in future.

.......

Letters To The Moon # 2

May 18, 2014

Dear Moon,

I was coming back after having an amazing weekend and all along the car ride, my eyes were searching for you. But in vain, I counted six stars but not a single moon. 

I am turning 19 and getting married in exactly three days.

That is huge. And I know it. 

I am nervous. But not over the top nervous. 

The one thing that scares me are the expectations people have of me and with me. And the assumptions everyone seems to make.

I do not care about what people think of me. But people I love, care about what others think. And my love for these people makes me care about people's expectations. Its like they have already decided that I am going to fall off the ladder. And instead of holding the ladder, everyone is just watching and waiting for me to fall.

But I will not fall. I am not that weak. And you know it. I mean, you are a rock yourself. 

I do not know what is going to happen. My life is going to change, that is a given. But one thing I am going to do is make sure that my foremost success is happiness. 

My happiness and the people I love and care about, their happiness.

The rest will follow. 

In time, I plan to accomplish everything I have dreamt of and planned for. 

But you know what, I am still a little scared. 

What do you think ? Do you think I will be able to do it all ? Do you think that life will give me a chance ? Or I will have to snatch it from life itself. Do you think that my optimism will be my doom ? Do you think that I will fall of the ladder ? 

I leave you with that question.

Adieu !

S

.....

Book Review: Revolution 2020 by Chetan Bhagat

Goodread's Review:

Once upon a time, in small-town India, there lived two intelligent boys.
One wanted to use his intelligence to make money.
One wanted to use his intelligence to create a revolution.
The problem was, they both loved the same girl.

Welcome to Revolution 2020. A story about childhood friends Gopal, Raghav and Aarti who struggle to find success and love in Varanasi. However, it isn't easy to achieve this in an unfair society that rewards the corrupt. As Gopal gives in to the system, and Raghav fights it, who will win?

Published: 2011
Author: Chetan Bhagat
Pages: 296
Genre: Contemporary, Asian Literature 
My rating: 4/5

I loved this book. I loved everything about it. The story is being told by a person whose point of view is changed by life itself and he does not do all good things. But somehow when you are reading it and even when he is handing out bribes to get the work done, he becomes the hero. I realized that being the narrative helps the character share their point of view, justifying their actions.

The main theme of the book was grate. I loved how Gopal struggles to fulfill the wishes of his father and become a big man. I also loved how his only goal was to make money. Ordinarily, I would have thought that that is very materialistic. But I was like, he does not have money to eat. He is right to set that goal. Gopal takes things into his own hands and decides that life will not give him anything by doing the right thing, so he decided how to get everything himself. Screw life. And I agree. 

But somehow, in between this great battle of earning money and being with the girl Aarti, he has loved all his life, he loses himself. He loses what made him, him. Raghav makes him realize what he has lost. And he somehow tries to make things right. He gives the most important thing in his life, which I have to say, I could not have done that. 

I loved the controversy between him and Raghav. Gopal is bribing and doing what everyone else does and Raghav wants to change that exact system. I loved how Gopal asks the writer at the end whether he thinks he is a good man. I mean, the man gave up his most priceless thing and still isn't sure of his goodness.

P.S. I LOVE the cover of this book. The colour combination is so awesome. I have been drooling over it since its been in my hands.

...SAP...

To Win, Be Willing To Lose

This year, because it was my senior year, everyone was looking into colleges and making final decisions about their studies. But what was shocking was the fact that so many of my classmates were not willing to try out.  They knew what they wanted, but they were not willing to work for it. They were fixated that they will not get in the college they want because they are not good enough. Or because the competition is very tough. And that really pissed me off. One of my own best friends was afraid that she might not be able to handle the responsibility of becoming a Doctor. I think, being a human being is the biggest responsibility. Because life itself is a competition. Its the biggest race there ever is.

I was watching a movie, involving a figure skater and her life and one of the characters says, "To win, you have to be willing to lose." What makes a winner, a winner is losing the first 100 times. Losing does not mean giving up. It just means working harder. For me, in order to win, whether it is Olympic Gymnastics or a History test, you have to be willing to try your best. Work your butt off, wake up when its still dark and work on your piques or learn the French proverbs. You have to be willing to push yourself, to let yourself go out there. And you have to be willing to face your fears and failures. . 

I remember when I was doing five sports at once in 5th grade. There were before school practices, after school practices and weekend practices. I used to eat on the way. And then I wanted to do Skipping as well. It was something I had never done before and a friend of mine was excellent at it. The first time I did skipping, I did 25 turns. Then I started working on it and in the competition, came second and I did 250 turns. I nailed it. That rush of adrenaline pumping through my body, my face all flushed and my coach telling me to go change for the next sport, it was surreal. 

My mom always says that you do not get anything handed to you on a silver platter. Figure skaters, gymnasts, swimmers, etc turn their whole lives around just to get a single gold medal. For them normal is not a word. A Gymnast lands on her butt 100 times a day, yet she still gets up and then nails her routine. They do all that just to stand on that podium, wear that Gold Medal and be called an Olympian. I used to see Gymnastics with  my Nano and I always wondered how beautiful, bold, graceful and enchanting they look. But none of us get to see the purple bruises all over their bodies, some brand new, some days old, bags under their eyes and hands hard as a rock. Those injuries are what make them capable of winning. 

Like Iqbal said, 

"Tu shaheen hai Parwaaz hai kaam tera  

Tere samne Aasman aur bhi hai"

Work for it. Work till you fall. Pick yourself up. Fall again. And then again and again. Than pick yourself up again. And keep picking yourself up till you forget what falling is. Work for it, till every bone in your body wants what your heart desires. Till every damn muscle aches and all the ice packs in the world cannot make that pain disappear. This is your fight, only and only yours. With your demons of fears and failures. And only you can defeat those demons. 

...SAP...