I am thankful. I am very very thankful. Gratitude is a very small word for what I am feeling right now. I am down with a really bad cold and flu, so I was banned from the hospital. I did not see Abbu today. But I knew that he was okay.
Have you ever imagined a life without your parents ? I am a typical South Asian kid who has spent half of her life living by holding her parents hand. There are dozens of times when I have had to ask their permission to go see a movie or meet a friend. I have argued over clothes and begged for more pocket money. I have made faces at the food cooked by Amma and laughed at Abbu trying to sound cool. That is pretty much my life.
Yes, I was also that kid who broke all rules and regulations in the house, who did not used to talk to her mother for days over a stupid argument. I have slammed doors and walked out on my parents. I have disagreed and disobeyed them. There have been times as a teenager, when I disliked them. I have done it all. But that is because they are my parents. They are my brick wall. The one I can always drive nails in or hammer at.
So the fact that my father is doing okay means a lot to me. It means everything to me right now. Someone said to me that after awhile, your parents house starts seeming like a stranger's. And you consider it a "Meka." That is a very typical notion. One supported by many of our women. But I disagree with this statement. I said that I don't feel like that. I was told that maybe its because I have not spent enough time in the house I live in right now. That is not the case.
People form a house. Not beds, dressers or bookshelves. For me, home has always been associated with the people living there at that time. So regardless of where I live, my parents house will always be like a home to me. It will always make me stay up all night eating ice cream and binge watching Nikita. It's that feeling where you take off your shoes and release your sucked in stomach because you are home.
Hence I am very grateful for my parents, for the fact that they are here for me. I am glad that I grew up in their household, with their values and habits. Because I do not want to loose that sense of home, that warmth of hot chocolate or freshly ground coffee.
That is all for now. I hope that we always carry that sense with us where ever life leads us.